In the most simplistic sense, life is too short to be fighting with and changing every behavior of ours. The choice we have is simple: Either we can make this very moment a celebration by accepting ourselves fully, or go on battling internally with what is right and wrong for the rest of our lives. The moment we realize that we are perfect just the way we are, then the change we are seeking is instantaneous. You will also notice that the more you accept yourself, the less there is a need for this internal conflict.
Society has one definition of a good man, one definition of a good woman, and one definition of what’s right and wrong. You are too vibrant a phenomenon to walk on this thin fine line drawn by society. What you need in order to remain simple, unique, and beautiful is a universal phenomenon such as watching and observing yourself. Meditation is that universal phenomenon. It’s not an ideology, philosophy, or religion – it’s just you and your ability to observe your life.
Initially, it is difficult to trust your meditation, because there is no one there to provide you guidance and support. It is just you, your mind, your body, and how you deal with them. In this sense, you have total freedom in meditation; so much freedom that for a while you won’t know if you are doing the right thing. Meditation says, “Leave all of this and just become existential. Don’t become philosophical or intellectual, don’t become this or that. Just become existential.”
Existential means to be in this moment; that is it. If I am angry in this moment, then I am angry. My anger is okay and I will just watch it. If I don’t need this anger, then it will just go away. If I don’t watch the anger, chances are that it will come back again. The beauty of every experience we have is that the moment we go deep into it, the moment we observe it, it disappears on its own. Whether the experience is good or bad doesn’t matter. Meditation simply says, “Keep watching, and whatever change that needs to happen in your life will happen on its own.”